How can one jar of peanut-butter cause so much trouble?
No kidding, that's what I wanted to know too. Because apparently it was A Big Problem and he made that quite clear. My husband was fed up with the sticky, slimy mess dripping down the sides of the peanut-butter jar and insisted we put a stop to the madness.
"Why can't we keep this jar clean?! There's no reason we should live like this and it's got to change," he stated with final authority.
Oh, but there was a very good reason as far as I was concerned and protested against the ultimatum. Actually, there were eight good reasons - all of them being under the age of 18 years. You see we have these things called children and one mother can't be on top of everything!
Why so unreasonable? So demanding?
Now on his behalf, I have to tell you that my husband is not a complainer. He doesn't make negative remarks about my cooking (no matter how "creative" it sometimes gets). He doesn't complain about having to throw on his robe in the morning and search for the essential items in the laundry room (really meant to fold and put those away...). He's even good about patiently sitting in the car and waiting for me to get out the door. And that can be a pretty long wait sometimes.
But the goopy peanut-butter container? That just about does him in.
So how many of you moms will side with me on this one? I mean, we have a bunch of children and they all make their own peanut-butter sandwiches. Even the six-year-old (who just lost his two front teeth - so darling!). Let's face it - it's a sticky, slimy world we live in.
Oh, thank you! I thought I could count on you (It's a good thing he doesn't blog or he'd surely have all the dads taking his side).
So I basically communicated to him....
Sorry. But that's just the way it has to be.
That we were going to have to learn to live with it. That he was asking the impossible. And I left him in the kitchen feeling quite justified in my rather defensive response.
Except for one thing.
I left the kitchen to recover and regroup in our front sitting room. Our "parlor" as we call it and my very favorite room in the house. It's beautiful. The Parlor has pretty pillows, a tea tray, and a clear glass (yes, that would be GLASS) coffee table. You're not allowed to eat in this room. Or have your electronic gadgets. No Legos, dirty socks, or rollerblades are permitted in the Parlor. Happy sigh.
I love this room.
Now wait! Are you beginning to wonder how it is that I can keep an entire room looking pristine even though we have all these children? With a glass coffee table, no less??
Well. It's because it's important to me, of course. Really important.
But I can't keep the peanut-butter jar wiped down?
Right.
Yeah, that's what got me too. You see, I have this tendency to take my priorities very seriously. Maybe his less so?
But I don't want to do that anymore.
In fact, I'm determined to have the cleanest peanut-butter jar in town.
So if you ever find yourself anywhere near our area, I hope you'll stop by 'cause I'd love to make you a peanut-butter sandwich. Or have that darling six-year-old of ours make you one. It's true that you might have to step over a heaping pile of rollerblades on the front porch and overlook the baskets of clean laundry waiting to be folded in the living room.
But you'll be sure to admire the amazingly clean peanut-butter container, won't you?
Because he sure does.
Honey, I love you and I want you to know that your priorities are important to me.
Really important.
Look not every man on his own things,
but every man also on the things of others.
~ Philippians 2:4
but every man also on the things of others.
~ Philippians 2:4
Today's Vow: To consider your priorities as I would my own.
The Challenge: Place those things that are the most important to him at the top of your list.
In His grace,
Lisa is the happily-ever-after wife of Matt Jacobson, literary agent and writer, and together they enjoy raising 8 children. Please join her over at Club31Women, a blog for any wife, mother, or sister who is looking for Biblical encouragement and inspiration.
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I am a single woman but I love coming here and reading about all the advise to other wives. I do hope you know what a blessing this blog is to women like me. It just really opens our eyes to married life.
ReplyDeleteOh how I loved this post Lisa! Thank you for this very convicting reminder. Our husbands all have their pet peeves, just as we do and, as was recently pointed out by Darlene herself, its the small things that sometimes do you in!
ReplyDeleteGod bless!
love this. thank you for sharing. my husband is just as kind and patient-inspiring me to be a better wife!
ReplyDeleteWow thanks, I forget to think like this sometimes. I mean I pride myself in thinking of others, I clean, cook, do laundry, put away stuff all so they don't have too, but when asked to do certain things I balk and forget to think about prioritzing their desires as importantly as my own.
ReplyDeleteThis is so true. For me it is the clutter on the entry way table or the kitchen table. When the mail comes in our we come in from being away from home, everyone lays things on these tables. It drives me crazy, especially if I just picked it up, but for my hubby it is laundry in baskets or on the floor and not put away. So I try to put it away quickly and pick up too.
ReplyDeletePleasing him upon entrance when coming home, a happy wife and supper or lunch waiting or at least being made and maybe a warm cup of a hot drink. Relaxing for him and rewarding for both of us. Cindy Hostetler
Excellent advice. It blessed me a lot.
ReplyDeleteLove this! It's so true. I often get caught up in the "my priorities are most important" thing and his get last place. Thanks for the really true reminder!
ReplyDeleteAnd when times are tough in a marriage, choosing to do these small things for your husband can keep your heart open to him during the healing and restoration process.
ReplyDeleteI definitely needed that reminder today. It also reminded me about a lady at my church who shared how her husband would ask her to do something for him, get something done etc and by days end she'd forgotten and would have to tell him his request hadn't been done. She made the commitment to herself that the requests her husband would ask of her would become her priority after spending time with God. If he needed her to go to the bank, certain clothes washed, an article printed etc she would do that first thing so should wouldn't disappoint her husband.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful reminder to make his priorities my priority! Thank you.
I like this post! It's very true, and we have the same issue with our honey jar! Putting yourself in someone else's shoes is good discipline! Thanks for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteGreat post
ReplyDeleteAnother solution, than driving yourself crazy cleaning a peanut butter jar a million times a day would be to have a "grown-up" jar just for hubby. That way he has his nice clean jar good to go until the littles can learn to clean it for themselves. Life is too short to worry about every single mess if there are other solutions. Now if just looking at a dirty peanut butter jar drives your hubby crazy that's another story ;)
ReplyDeleteExcellent Reminder!! I often forget the little things that make him happy...like always having the soap container filled.
ReplyDeleteWow, very convicting. I actually sighed out loud when I read the words, "well, because it's important to me." Thank you for this awesome series! I am also doing the "30 Day Marriage Challenge" (was that from your blog too?). Today's goal: Imagine how it feels to be in your husband's shoes. Perfect post to make me think even more!
ReplyDeleteLove this post! Very convicting...and timely. :)
ReplyDeleteLove this Lisa!!! I have been convicted of this also, not the peanut butter jar. ;) But making his priorities important to me. Thanks for sharing this!
ReplyDelete