You're not supposed to have favorites. I know that.
It doesn't sound very Christian-like, does it?
And yet I do.
What can I say? I can relate to some Bible characters more than others. Some have stories that seem to speak directly to me. Like they were my own. As if we were born sisters, simply separated by a few thousand years.
So you want to know who my Biblical soul-sister would be?
Hannah.
Yeah, her. I just love that lady.
My answer might surprise you. After all, what does a woman who is best-known for her barrenness have to do with a woman who's the mother to 8 children? Okay, so maybe it's not immediately obvious, but we have more in common than would first appear.
Hannah was dearly loved by her husband.
But to Hannah he would give a double portion, for he loved Hannah (I Sam.1:5).
She knew sorrow that reached to the depths of her heart.
And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed to the LORD and wept in anguish (I Sam.1:10).
You're probably familiar with Hannah's story (found in the first two chapters of I Samuel) and so I'll briefly share my own.
Our fifth child - the dearest baby girl you can imagine - was born with severe brain damage. She'd suffered a massive stroke while I was still pregnant with her. No one knows why. It was just "one of those things" and the doctors didn't have any hope to offer us. This girl would never walk, talk, or even know her own parents - if she lived at all. They didn't make the slightest attempt to hide the grimness of her situation.
Now what else could a mama do when she finds herself in such a place? I could only hold that darling bundle of baby girl and "weep in anguish". Cry out to God. With bitterness of soul.
Yes, Hannah, I understand what it's like to want something - or someone - so badly that you think your heart might just break before it's all over. To pour out your soul before The Lord and beg for His mercy on you. To call out His Name and yet hardly dare hope He'll hear. You long for a miracle so very badly.
I know how it is to have heartache.
And I know how it is to be remembered.
Because God heard my cries too. Performed miracles. He answered and spared her life. But more than that....He allowed her to laugh, to talk, and to wrap her sweet arms around my neck and hug me tight. She knows her mama alright. She calls me by name and tells me she loves me every day.
I am remembered.
So Hannah and I sing pretty much the same song. Rejoicing. We share the same story of how God heard our prayers and gave us a gift beyond belief.
Like her, I'm a woman who stood by you here - praying. And it was granted.
I am the woman who stood by you here, praying to the LORD. For this child I prayed, and the LORD has granted me my petition which I asked of Him" (I Sam 1:26-27).
For this child I prayed.
Highlights from Hannah:
- Hannah poured out her soul before The Lord. (1:15)
- The Lord remembered her. (1:19)
- Hannah gave testimony of His work in her life. (1:27)
- She gave her gift back to The Lord. (1:28)
- She rejoiced in what He had done. (2:1)
So you can see why I feel so close to Hannah. As if she's somehow a sister to me. Her heart speaks to mine - only a few millennia apart, really. Soul-sisters. Singing the same song.
One of my favorites.
And maybe one of yours.
Do you have a Hannah-like testimony? Have you been remembered? We'd be blessed if you shared yours, too.....
In His grace,
Lisa is the happily-ever-after wife of Matt Jacobson, literary agent and writer, and together they enjoy raising 8 children. Please join her over at Club31Women, a blog for any wife, mother, or sister who is looking for Biblical encouragement and inspiration.
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Hannah is one of my favorites in the Bible. I have been trying to conceive for 6 years or so. Her story makes me hopeful :)
ReplyDeletePraying for you, Rachel. I too have not been able to conceive. We have been married over ten years. I have finally been able to come to terms with it and still have hope that when God sees fit it will happen. God Bless You!
DeleteHannah is one of my favorites, too. But I have a friend that's like a sister that had a Hannah moment, too. She was told she would never be able to conceive. Her and her husband had to surrender to God and learn to live a life of gratitude even though their heart's desire was to have a baby. Once they surrendered, she found out she was pregnant. I was honored to be with her as she gave birth. And then the miracle happened again when her 2nd child was born. God is so good!
ReplyDeleteI love Hannah too! I wrote 2 papers on her in Bible college. She is such an inspiration and encouragement. I have friends that have had similar situations happen,but I haven't in regards to children. We've been blessed with 3 boys back to back with no complications. We've had other struggles and had to desperately cry out to God and He heard us. :)
ReplyDeleteI have a Hannah moment, too. It ended in both heartache and joy. In 1993, I wanted another baby so badly. I craved a baby. I had a son and daughter already, as well as a miscarried angel in Heaven. I begged Heavenly Father to bless us with another baby. He heard me.
ReplyDeleteBut something wasn't right. My cycle freaked out, but I was pregnant; I knew it. I was still having the monthly visitor. I went for a pregnancy test anyway. They told me it was negative. I told them it was wrong and asked for an ultrasound. They said no, that it wasn't warranted. The test said that I wasn't pregnant, so they so no grounds for further testing. I left their office.
After a few months, I could feel her moving around inside me. It was wonderful. I knew that another precious baby was coming. Heavenly Father had heard me.
We went to Walmart one evening and the bleeding worsened. I got home and felt a weird feeling when I went to the bathroom. And there she was, my precious baby girl, stillborn in our apartment. Heavenly Father gave her to me, but not to keep. That was 15 July 1993. She would have been 20 this past Monday.
But Hevenly Father didn't forget me, didn't desert me in my time of grief. He had a reason for this. He had a son in His plans for me. Within 6 weeks of Dorian going to Heaven, we found out that our youngest son was on the way. I was scared that I would lose him, too. When it was time for him to be born, I fought it and fought hard. To have him leave my body was tantamount to losing him in my grieving mama-heart. His head was delivered approximately 20 times before I allowed the rest of him to be born.
He is the healthiest of all of my children so far. Heavenly Father blessed me with a beautiful, healthy son just over 19 years ago, and thirteen months after his birth, we were blessed with another daughter who bears Dorian's middle name in her honor.
Two more miscarried babies now await me in Heaven. With the sadness of the loss of these 4 babies there is the joy in knowing that no harm, no pain, no evil will ever come to them. They are safely in His arms. There is also joy in the four blessings that He gave to me to love here on this earth.
"...weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." -Psalm 30:5
I have many friends who couldn't conceive so her story is a touching one. It really inspires me to "give it all to God"...especially my children like she did because he's only loaned them to me anyway.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this touching reminder of a wonderful woman of God.
Blessings,
Shan
www.The-How-to-Guru.com
My little girl was 2 months old, fighting for her life and under going a second open heart surgery. I didn't care that she had Down syndrome. All I care about was that she would live. I begged God to spare her life. He heard my prayer. She just turned 15 on Sunday. She loves the Lord and loves all people. She is a joy and delight to many people and I thank God for her.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful story! I'm curious if you named your daughter Hannah or something else that means 'grace.' My little one had severe issues at birth and my husband and I had Anna picked out before she was born. Her medical issues were resolved in two weeks, praise God! Surely, He poured out his grace on us and her name was very appropriate. :-)
ReplyDeleteBTW, Leah is my favorite woman in the Bible. :-)
Elena
Wow. There ain't nothin like being forgotten, you feel the whole world fallling around you. Ive been there its like no one hears your cries, or cares its a horrible feeling to b disappointed left for dead. Like your pain escapes the notice of the father like he is not concerned. You start to doubt and wonder if its evdn worth your petition at all. Oh but to be remembered by God.
ReplyDeleteOh, Alli! I don't know what you are going through but I do understand soul pain! I'm so sorry that you are hurting! Please know that you haven't been left for dead.Jesus does hear you and He does save! Please give Him your heart let him lead your life. Cry out to him and give Him your pain. Dig into the Word, talk to a Pastor that's what they are there for! I'll be praying for you, Alli!
DeleteOh Alli! I don't know what you are going through but I do understand soul pain! I know it feels like Jesus doesn't hear you, but he does! Cry out to him give him you're heart. You haven't been left for dead, He loves you! Talk to a Pastor, that's what they are there for! Know that I'll be praying for you, Alli!
DeleteI was told before I ever got married that I'd never have children. I told that to my fiance, and he said "I'm not worried, God's in charge." We got married, and 3 months later I was pregnant! Unfortunately, I miscarried that baby. About a year and a half later, I got pregnant again. That baby also died. About a month after that, I was pregnant again, and the Lord allowed us to keep this child! My daughter was born 2 weeks early, and 24 hours after I went home with her, I was admitted to ICU because of a rare case of post-pregnancy pre-eclampsia. I almost died. Doctor said "No more children!" About a year and a half later, I did get pregnant again, but again, the Lord took that baby home when I was about 12 weeks along. We decided we were done with that route, as it was emotionally and physically very difficult. Today my daughter is 5 1/2, perfectly healthy, very smart, and a blessing to my life! And we are currently 1 week away from beginning our homestudy to adopt out of foster care. When God chooses to take away, he always, always has a perfect reason for it. I can't wait to see how He grows our family!
ReplyDeleteI am still in the "crying out" stage of my story. I have proof that I have wanted to be a mom since I was in elementary school. My mom kept a school book for me and every year on the "what do you want to be when you grow up" section, I wanted to be a mom. Now I am 31, married, and I don't know if that heart's desire will come to pass. I have had dreams of my children. I've seen their smiles. But time passes and those dreams have yet to become a reality. So while I wait...and wait... my biggest job is to keep the gift from becoming more to me than the Gift-Giver. If this dream never becomes weight in my arms, He is still good! He is still God! And most of all, He still loves me. I have to work hard at being content in Him. Sometimes that is a daily struggle. But the Giver of Life and all things good knows my struggles and my hurts. He is aquainted with my grief and created me in my own mother's womb. So I can trust Him. I love all of my sisters out there. This is for the ones still waiting. God bless!
ReplyDeleteI think my Hannah moment came after we lost our last baby at 34 weeks. It was during that dark period of time in grief that I realized I could turn it all around by giving back and helping other grieving parents through their losses. I counseled for pregnancy loss for 9 years after that on a volunteer basis at the hospital where I worked. God didn't cause my loss but He was there for me when it happened. I'm thankful for my sweet little Levi. His brief time with me showed me God's true love for me.
ReplyDeleteI am the blessed mother of ten precious children and one on the way... so, some would not understand how I can relate to Hannah, but I do. Early into our marriage we felt very convicted to adopt... several years and several birth children later we found ourselves living in Africa, for hubby's job.. Once again the calling to adopt became clear, and as I was volunteering in an orphanage I fell in love with a precious baby girl. After months of every day going to the orphanage and helping to care for her, we were finally able to bring her home... a few weeks later we also brought home a precious baby boy. The Lord made his desires so clear to us, with that precious little boy, even though it was not in our "plans" at first. You see we had been blessed with 5 children by birth.. of those we had only one son, and he is second oldest.. all of our younger children are girls, so it made sense to us that the Lord would put this precious baby girl in our heart and home.. the little boy we were perplexed, but loved equally... After 8 months in our home, the precious little girl, was taken from us. There were legal issues surrounding her, that despite our best efforts were not able to be resolved. WE needed to move forwarded with the baby boy's adoption. It was the most painful day of my life, bringing that precious baby back to the orphanage... I cried, and sobbed... our adoption agency eventually placed us with a second precious boy, and both boys we were able to adopt. We felt so blessed, but oh how my heart ached for my baby girl.. as the years have went on, we have been blessed with 4 more baby girls by birth!! Every time someone replies "oh, another girl" I smile... I know God has increased our blessing, by allowing us more daughters to love and raise!! I learned so much, about trusting our Lord and trusting HIS plans, which aren't always our plans... God is so, so GOOD!!
ReplyDeleteHannah is a favorite of mine as well. My husband & I tried to conceive a second child for over 8 years. We have finally made peace with God's unknown plan and are enjoying the blessing of one daughter however I still have the tiniest hole in my heart that longs for a sibling for her.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I don't know what the future holds I am able to see joy and peace at the hands of a loving gracious God who has allowed me time and space to gently accept his "no". God is good and has blessed me beyond measure.
I had a Hannah moment...after our firstborn went to be with Christ, I wanted another baby very much. I threw myself into an emotional maelstrom, the desire was so bad. I cried out to Him daily, my heart yearning for another precious child. On the first anniversary of our childs passing, we found out we were pregnant again. We've since had another child as well. We're so blessed and these children are indeed gifts.
ReplyDeleteWhat an amazing story! Praise God for miracles! I too find Hannah to be my favorite.
ReplyDeleteHow appropriate that you posted this on the 17th of July. It was my sons 5th birthday yesterday and he is a healthy happy 5 year old who built his first 5 to 7 year old lego set all by himself for the first time. But things weren't always so good. I have always held Hannah's story close to my heart. I miscarried the first baby I was pregnant with and I was told at 12 weeks that our second pregnancy had genetic defects. I went to see a fetal scanning specialist who told me that there was indeed something profoundly wrong with our child but that he couldn't tell what it was. To cut a very long story short our son was born and at 4 months he was diagnosed with achondroplasia (dwarfism). At that stage he had very short limbs and a very big head, we were devastated. Our baby wasn't going to have the life we hoped for him and although this wasn't a life limiting disease it certainly was life challenging. We prayed and prayed and prayed and asked God to heal him, we spoke to his bones and told them to grow and then we had a stranger ask if he could pray for him because God wanted to heal him. The man we met prayed and told us that God was going to use our son powerfully. From there we saw no immediate change but little by little his arms got longer and his body grew so that his head was more in proportion. Our paediatritian and the genetic counsellor are amazed and a test has confirmed his healing...for healing to occur in our case, every cell in his body has to be altered because it is a genetic disease. Our God is awesome and we thank Him everyday.
ReplyDeleteI found your story about your daughter verymoving. But I don't understand a God who could do this to a child and then only save her because of her mothers prayers. I have 2 children with autism. My daughter was incredibly active. Just a few months ago she had a stroke. It left her paralysed unable to walk or move her arms. I just could not pray for her. Every bit of faith left me that day I stood by her side in the Casualty Department. Some how she survived given that the hospital took over 2 days to recognise it was a stroke and begin treatment. She is now home again and slowly recovering. It was easier for me to believe there is no God than a God who can do this to children and only reach out when we pray 'hard enough" for intervention. Liz
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for you and your family. Have there been any improvements in her condition since you last posted this?
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